My heart has been broken many times. But never so painful as by Rina.
I loved her more than myself. I loved her because she is the saddest person I know. I loved her because of her inadeaquacies. She returned my love, for a while.
But somewhere along the line, she changed. I could no longer recognize her. Worse, I am changed because of her. I am drawn into her mess, unable to get out when she herself has cleaned the mess inside her.
‘I am sorry Rina. I am not tough. You are much tougher than me. I cannot bear to hurt you. Isn’t it better when I’m not around so that you’ll never get hurt by me.’
It’s painful. Just now, I met a pretty girl from the Law School of the University of Indonesia, but all I can talk about with her is my breakup with Rina.
All I can think about right now is my breakup with Rina.
Life has always goes on for me. It will go a little slower this time. ‘Rina, love, you will get a nice guy who will make you come someday. I wish you, I really wish you and your daughter, all the best things in life.’
I miss you love. Silverchair captures my emotion perfectly about this breakup:
Remember today
Ive no respect for you
And I miss you love
And I miss use love
I love the way you love
But I hate the way
Im supposed to love you back
